And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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