dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
