i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
