I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I am midnight drunk by noon
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize