you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
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