You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
