Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
