is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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