dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize