There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
