is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
