You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
