Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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