he puts the penis in happiness.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
