Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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