So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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