I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
