We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
