I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
