I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
