I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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