theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
