are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
