dude i'm inner monologue high
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
