arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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