I hate all girls vehemently.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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