He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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