ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
