Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I am available for nakedness
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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