Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
