your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
thus making me awesome and them whores
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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