My cat gives me a boner
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
