3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
