; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
