I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
