My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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