I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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