I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize
