Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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