We won't sleep together?
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
