you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
