This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
