i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
