Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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