think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
so let's talk penis.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
