Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
