dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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