I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
