She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Never underestimate the power of titties
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
