"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
