So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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