wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
