you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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