Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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